Apple retail application, questions, cover letter?

[alex.m90]

Looking for a Job at Apple retail over the summer because I am getting sick of doing the same thing day in, day out where I currently work.

Below is my cover letter. I have never had to write a cover letter before so it could be completely wrong, I was hoping if you could look over it/critique it.

I'm not sure whether to mention my education as first of all, I am still waiting for my A-Level results, it seems a waste not to as I am doing some tough subjects, however it is difficult to implement!

Dear Apple Recruiters,

Having recently checked, I am aware there are vacancies at my local Apple retail store in Leicester.

I currently work in a Waitrose branch. Over the past year, I have obtained a lot of experience in retail, customer service and ability to work efficiently as part of a team. My primary duties are concerned with stock management, minimizing wastage, as well as being there for customers when they need help on the shop floor.

My dad bought an iMac home back in 2000. Ever since then I have been very much into computers and technology, and have gained a considerable amount of experience with a variety of difference hardware and software.

Having been in some form of work since the age of 14, I believe in a positive work ethic, good teamwork skills; and when it comes to retail, providing good, friendly customer service can go a long way.

My attached resume contains additional details about my experience and skills. I can be contacted by phone at 075&*£$45, or by email at *&^@&$*@gmail.com to provide further information or reference contact details.

Thank you for your consideration, and I hope to hear back from you soon.

Sincerely,
....

 

[jalf991]

having worked for Apple retail for 4.5 years, Ive read many cover letters and trained many new employees.

This cover letter shows very little personality.

Talk about how when your father brought home an iMac it changed your life, and you'd like to extend that feeling to as many people as you can.

Good luck with your interview.

 

[SiriDV]

I would get rid of the while iMac nonsense. They don't care. I can't stress enough that their looking for a good person, not necessarily an Apple fiend. Personally, I would just make your cover letter a generic one. Maybe throw in a few reasons why you want to work there, etc. that's what got me though the door.

 

[alex.m90]

Thanks for the feedback, although now I have 2 replies, one suggesting I extend on the iMac and make it more elaborate and another saying I should get rid of it all together? I haven't sent in my application yet as I have just finished exams. I'll have another look at it this week.

Thanks again!

 

[Fatal1ty]

I, too, am in the process of applying to a few Apple Retail locations and am stuck on the cover sheet.

Could others elaborate or provide insight on whether or not personal, "passionate" experiences with the Apple ecosystem are good material for the cover sheet, or a more professional, maybe even generic voice should be used.

Thanks