Sidebar Sidebar
Become a MacRumors Supporter for $50/year with no ads, ability to filter front page stories, and private forums.

Bear Drinks 36 Cans of Favorite Beer

C

craigdawg

macrumors 6502
Original poster
Mar 8, 2004
360
0
Sactown
When I read the subject title I was really hoping it was going to be LaBatt's Blue (sp?). You know, cause they use the bear int he commercials.
 
A drunken Smokey the Bear was seen last night harassing small children. He reportedly told several children that they're going to grow up to be smokers and start forest fires. He also reportedly tried to put out several campfires by urinating on them. Smokey could not be reached for comment, as he was being detained in the Park Services "Temporary Drunk Tank", but his attourney told the press, "The reports that Smokey's Blood Aclohol Level was at .34 is absolutely absurd. Sure, Smokey had a few drinks, but there are no laws against bears consuming aclohol in this country."

Several of the children involved at the scene reportedly asked their parent why Smokey was acting "Funny." Several of the children's parents have expressed their plans to file a civil law suit against Smokey, the State park where the incident occured, and the company that manufactures the beer that Smokey drank. Betty Jo Crawford stated, "Since when did the beer companies start making beer that tastes good to bears?! That's completely irresponsible. We can't have a bunch of bears running around here drunk!"

Smokey the Bear, if found guilty, will most likely be sentenced to community service, where he would teach children the dangers of alcohol.
 
I love the trap they set for him the next day

They set a trap using as bait some doughnuts, honey and two cans of Rainier Beer. It worked, and the bear was captured for relocation.
Click to expand...

just in case the doughnuts and honey don't work, give him so of the beer to wash it all down :D

D
 
How cool would it be to sit and have a beer or two with a bear? I doubt he'd be up to chasing you around anyway. Potential Kodak moment wasted. :(

Hey, speaking of 'wasted'.... :p
 
Abstract said:
How cool would it be to sit and have a beer or two with a bear? I doubt he'd be up to chasing you around anyway. Potential Kodak moment wasted. :(

Hey, speaking of 'wasted'.... :p
Click to expand...
Dude...see that rrangerr? Hee thinkss I juurrink too much. So I have a couple three dozenn beerssss every once ana while. I can quit whennever I want. Whennever I want.

Boo Boo. Beer me dude.
 
kgarner said:
When I read the subject title I was really hoping it was going to be LaBatt's Blue (sp?). You know, cause they use the bear int he commercials.
Click to expand...
When I think of a beer bear, I think of Hamm's. I was looking for a good link to the Hamm's bear, but I couldn't find one. Whatever happened to him?
 
What I don't understand is why they call him a "beer sophisticate"; rainier beer is the equivalent of pbr (who now incidentally owns it) and its not even local: years ago it moved to olympia to be brewed with Olympia beer, only to relocate again to wisconsin (not near mt. rainier at all) after the pabst buyout.
 
MontgomeryBurns said:
What I don't understand is why they call him a "beer sophisticate"; rainier beer is the equivalent of pbr (who now incidentally owns it) and its not even local: years ago it moved to olympia to be brewed with Olympia beer, only to relocate again to wisconsin (not near mt. rainier at all) after the pabst buyout.
Click to expand...

pbr = NASTY
 
I just hope the the bear will be OK. That much beer could be toxic to his liver. Detoxification rates vary, so hopefully they got to the bear in time.
 
virividox said:
i read that his morning in the paper i couldnt stop laughing, poor bear :) he must hurt himself with that hang over!!!
Click to expand...

well, he wasn't suffering that much if he went back for more of the beer :D

All the beer companies are missing a great marketing ploy....put out 10 different beers and see which one the bear likes - instant spokesbear and celeb....

D
 
macsrus said:
Why is American Beer like making love in a canoe?

Because its close to water.
Click to expand...

please understand that the rules are in place on purpose -especially the profanity filter :rolleyes:

That being said, you need to try some other American beers that don't come in a can. There are plenty that could stand up in a crowd from anywhere in the world.

D
 
Mr. Anderson said:
well, he wasn't suffering that much if he went back for more of the beer :D

D
Click to expand...

Nahh, judging by his beer taste he's smarter than the average bear and understands hair of the dog...
 
The Beer Bear Choice

Today a legend was born. This Beer Bear will be talked about by beer drinkers for generations.

I do not know much about American beers but if I had to choose between Busch and Rainier I would choose Rainier. If Busch is not good enough for the bear then it would not be good enough for me.
 
Sol said:
I do not know much about American beers but if I had to choose between Busch and Rainier I would choose Rainier. If Busch is not good enough for the bear then it would not be good enough for me.
Click to expand...

I don't know much about American Beer either, but if it's a Busch I would assume it's from the Anheiser-Busch (sp?) company which would make it related to Budwieser. In my books that might even be more undrinkable than a Coors Light.
 
Budwieser tastes sweet

stcanard said:
I don't know much about American Beer either, but if it's a Busch I would assume it's from the Anheiser-Busch (sp?) company which would make it related to Budwieser. In my books that might even be more undrinkable than a Coors Light.
Click to expand...

Budwieser is not bad; I like it because it tastes different to all the other beers. To me it tastes like it has a hint of rose-water which makes it sweet, or as sweet as a beer can be.

I wonder how Beer Bear would rate it.
 
Busch is horrible. It is cheaper and more watery than even Coors Light. I would choose both Rainier and PBR before I drank a Busch. They also have the most absurd advertising (Busch).
 
Mr. Anderson said:
please understand that the rules are in place on purpose -especially the profanity filter :rolleyes:

That being said, you need to try some other American beers that don't come in a can. There are plenty that could stand up in a crowd from anywhere in the world.

D
Click to expand...

I didnt use profanity.... I bleeped it out myself.... The filter didnt.
And the joke was from an old Monte Python Skit
 
maxterpiece said:
Busch is horrible. It is cheaper and more watery than even Coors Light. I would choose both Rainier and PBR before I drank a Busch. They also have the most absurd advertising (Busch).
Click to expand...

They had the story about the bear on our local nightly news. None of the park patrons seemed to be bothered by the bear. According to the park ranger the bear seemed to prefer local beer produced in Washington.

They moved the bear so he won't be tempted again.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Register on MacRumors! This sidebar will go away, and you'll see fewer ads.
Top Bottom
Back