I have large ear holes, so I feel your pain, the large apple tips will almost work, but use the large comply work just fine
to get the best seal, I use the opposite hand to grab my ear just behind the hole, so inserting right AirPod, Right hand holds the AirPod, left is reaching behind my head, and slightly pulling back on my ear lobe to kinda open the hole a bit more. Start with the stem almost horizontal pointing forwards, then rotate down to "normal" position as you slightly push in.
or if they're already in, do the ear pull thing, and you can kinda give the airpods a wiggle, and push them a bit further in.
one thing with the comply, the do break down after a while, so I normally replace them every 3-6 months, I notice the noise blocking isn't as good. the breakdown happens from use, and being compressed in your ears, so the other pairs in the set of 3 should be fine.