Dateless? Try a picnic table

[TheQuestion]

Warning...evidently there may be legal ramifications for fornicating with a picnic table (in certain spots). I love FoxNews.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,343031,00.html

Obviously sex with a piece of wood isn't the issue, but it makes a damn fine headline.

 

[Keebler]

geez. i've heard of women and bedposts, but a picnic table...

my lord....

 

[Stampyhead]

I think it's significant that the police captain's last name is 'Johnson'...

 

[Abstract]

Was the table any good?

 

[iJohnHenry]

Was the table any good?

Well, I guarantee it didn't say the ceiling needed painting??

 

[yg17]

Ummm.....where on the table do you put it? And how do you avoid splinters? OUCH!

 

[iJohnHenry]

Read the links.

Turn the table on it's side, and say hello to the umbrella hole.

 

[RaceTripper]

Mysterious dried-up white stuff left on public picnic tables will never be the same again.

 

[TheQuestion]

Mysterious dried-up white stuff left on public picnic tables will never be the same again.

Yuck!!!! I did not need to think about that!

 

[Prof.]

Ummm.....where on the table do you put it?

Picnic tables have a lot of holes

And how do you avoid splinters? OUCH!

It was a metal picnic table

 

[RedTomato]

I suppose it's appropriate to say: "Get a room!"

Tables have feelings too you know. Need to wine and dine them, and then go somewhere private. Mind the candles though, or it could get hotter than you expect.

at the time of day he tried it on - 'always between 10.30am and noon'. Guess we know he has a taste for morning wood.

 

[Abstract]

I suppose it's appropriate to say: "Get a room!"

And some chairs while you're at it.....maybe some new curtains!

 

[yg17]

Picnic tables have a lot of holes

It was a metal picnic table

AHhh, OK. I didn't read the article, I try to avoid Faux News