From the Late Show website:
Top Ten Little-Known Features of the New iPhone
10. Shows you pictures of food you can no longer afford since you purchased it
9. Every time you hit the "shift" button Bill Gates gets a shock
8. Automatically deletes e-mail subpoenaed by Congress
7. Also comes in the heavier "Russell Crowe" model -- better for throwing at people
6. For an extra hundred bucks, they'll capitalize the "i"
5. Vibrate mode "guarantees satisfaction"
4. Gives a GPS warning when Nicole Richie is driving toward you
3. Runs the city of Philadelphia for you, so you're free to wait in line for iPhone 2
2. Alerts you every time Paris Hilton finds God
1. Automatically removes 600 dollars from your wallet
Top Ten Little-Known Features of the New iPhone
10. Shows you pictures of food you can no longer afford since you purchased it
9. Every time you hit the "shift" button Bill Gates gets a shock
8. Automatically deletes e-mail subpoenaed by Congress
7. Also comes in the heavier "Russell Crowe" model -- better for throwing at people
6. For an extra hundred bucks, they'll capitalize the "i"
5. Vibrate mode "guarantees satisfaction"
4. Gives a GPS warning when Nicole Richie is driving toward you
3. Runs the city of Philadelphia for you, so you're free to wait in line for iPhone 2
2. Alerts you every time Paris Hilton finds God
1. Automatically removes 600 dollars from your wallet