"did boot with it selected and it crashes partway thru"
Try booting again with a "safe boot" (hold down the shift key while booting).
If you can't resolve this problem, then...
I would "wipe" the SSD and start over.
Boot to INTERNET recovery
Command-OPTION-R
Keep holding down those keys for a while after you press the power on button!
If you use wifi, enter your wifi password when requested.
Once the utilities get loaded, open disk utility.
IMPORTANT IMPORTANT IMPORTANT
Go to the "view" menu and choose "show all devices"....
Now, look at the list on the left.
Locate the SSD.
There may be more than one "line" associated with it.
You want to click on the highest one that represents the drive itself
(and not a "volume" that is ON the drive)
Now, click "erase" (make sure any user data on the drive is BACKED UP).
Erase to APFS, GUID partition format.
When the erase is done, quit disk utility.
Now open the OS installer.
Start clicking through.
The Mac will reboot one or more times, and the screen will go dark for a minute or more with no other indication of activity. Just be patient.
When done, you should see the initial setup screen (choose your language).
At this point, if you have a backup, connect it.
Start clicking through.
It's UP TO YOU as to whether you want to restore from the backup, or create a completely-new account.
I'd try the backup first.
If you're going with setup assistant, it will ask if you wish to migrate from another drive - YES, you do.
"Point the way" for SA to the backup.
Give it time to "digest" everything. Be patient.
SA will present you with a list of stuff to migrate.
I'd try everything.
Let SA do its thing, again, will take a while.
When done, you should see your login screen.
Good luck.