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iMessage vrs SMS

jasnw

jasnw

macrumors 65816
Original poster
Nov 15, 2013
1,076
1,140
Seattle Area (NOT! Microsoft)
This is an "I give up" query. My brother has had an iPhone for many years, as have I. For whatever reason, texts between us always go via SMS. He recently got a second iPhone, and that one also only "does" SMS. To see if the problem was on my end I deleted my brother's entry from Contacts, deleted all previous texts, and scoured him from the various beasties that like to hang on to hold information unbeknownst to everyone. So, I put in a new Contact entry for my brother for both phones, indicating (for what it's worth) that both were iPhones. Then I tried to send a text (this from my computer, running the latest Sonoma) and it immediately switched to using SMS. This without even entering anything to send or trying to send anything. This is a problem I've tried to resolve many times, with much googling and FAQing and trying of things that don't work. (I'm running iOS 18.5 on a 2nd gen iPhone SE, his latest iPhone was purchased new last week, so it's the latest iOS and some recent iPhone hardware. His old iPhone is probably similar to mine.)

SO, what is it and where is it that is insisting that my connection between my iPhone and my brother's iPhone cannot be iMessage? My brother is borderline technologically inept, so I'm needing to know pretty precisely what needs fixing if it's something on his end.
 
I have to ask. On both phones, is iMessage enabled in settings at Settings > Apps > Messages?

I've read that an iPhone can send SMS even when iMessage is enabled if there is a weak wifi or cell signal, but I wouldn't think that would occur all the time or a long period.
 
aihpcfl said:
I've read that an iPhone can send SMS even when iMessage is enabled if there is a weak wifi or cell signal, but I wouldn't think that would occur all the time or a long period.
Click to expand...

Many many years ago, I turned that option off because SMS's were being sent far too often.
 
@jasnw To @kitKAC 's point, as troubleshooting, if you do have iMessage enabled in settings and Send as Text Message is also enabled, you might disable Send as Text Message and test.

I've never done this so I can't tell you what to expect. Maybe @kitKAC will tell you the various possible outcomes. Anyway, from what I understand, if you disable Send as Text Message and iMessage is unavailable, then the device will store and hold the message until iMessage becomes available and then send. If you coordinate the test with your brother you might be able to figure out what is happening.
 
Can you FaceTime between each other? If that’s not working either, has he got the right numbers/email addresses selected in Settings under send and receive?
 
aihpcfl said:
@jasnw To @kitKAC 's point, as troubleshooting, if you do have iMessage enabled in settings and Send as Text Message is also enabled, you might disable Send as Text Message and test.

I've never done this so I can't tell you what to expect. Maybe @kitKAC will tell you the various possible outcomes. Anyway, from what I understand, if you disable Send as Text Message and iMessage is unavailable, then the device will store and hold the message until iMessage becomes available and then send. If you coordinate the test with your brother you might be able to figure out what is happening.
Click to expand...
Nope, changing this setting on my end made no difference. All texts were sent, and all went via SMS regardless of the setting. I even powered the phone down after changing the setting and it made no difference.
 
jasnw said:
Nope, changing this setting on my end made no difference. All texts were sent, and all went via SMS regardless of the setting. I even powered the phone down after changing the setting and it made no difference.
Click to expand...
There are a couple other good questions. I took it for granted that this a problem between you and your brother only, but @FreakinEurekan is asking a question that also needs to be asked, just to confirm: Can you iMessage with others?

And I think the questions from @aperfectcircle goes to the matter of iCloud, either on your end or your brother's end. It would be worth you and your brother going through all iCloud settings and looking for typos or incorrect information, and next logging out of your account on the device and logging back in.
 
jasnw said:
Coordinating some tests with my brother to try some of the other suggestions. Would his carrier be part of the problem (I think he's with T-Mobile)?
Click to expand...
I wouldn't think so, not with iPhones. I'm on T-Mobile and have been for years. Haven't had this issue or anything like it with iPhone. (I did have some issue, I've forgotten now, when using a BlackBerry on T-Mobile in a certain city, but not always. That is why I hedge my answer. Maybe there is something with the carrier network in the location. I don't have a clue and can only say I haven't had an issue except that one time, with a different device, a long, long time ago.)

Other ideas I just thought of: Are you or your brother using a VPN? If so, turn off the VPN and test.

Also, are either you or your brother using a Mac with settings that allow you to send and receive iMessages from the Mac? If so, what if you send from the Mac?

Thinking some more along the lines of @aperfectcircle, you have the capability to send an iMessage to an email address, and receive iMessages sent to you at an email address, if that information is provided and enabled in settings. You could test by composing a message from scratch and try sending to a phone number and then sending another test message to an email address, as see if makes a difference. I'm not sure at the moment what that tells you in the event that it makes a difference, but it will be a thread to pull in the event it does.
 
aihpcfl said:
There are a couple other good questions. I took it for granted that this a problem between you and your brother only, but @FreakinEurekan is asking a question that also needs to be asked, just to confirm: Can you iMessage with others?

And I think the questions from @aperfectcircle goes to the matter of iCloud, either on your end or your brother's end. It would be worth you and your brother going through all iCloud settings and looking for typos or incorrect information, and next logging out of your account on the device and logging back in.
Click to expand...
This is a problem with my brother only. Everyone else I text with on a routine basis who have iPhones have no problem sending me or receiving from me iMessage texts. A question I have asked him is if he has this problem with others or just me. No answer yet. Maybe this is some sort of cosmic Big Brother (me) vs. Little Brother (him) karma thing?

I'm trying to avoid iCloud fiddling. We both actively dislike in-the-cloud stuff and disable whatever of it we can. I have only Calendar and Contacts enabled for iCloud use.
 
aihpcfl said:
I wouldn't think so, not with iPhones. I'm on T-Mobile and have been for years. Haven't had this issue or anything like it with iPhone. (I did have some issue, I've forgotten now, when using a BlackBerry on T-Mobile in a certain city, but not always. That is why I hedge my answer. Maybe there is something with the carrier network in the location. I don't have a clue and can only say I haven't had an issue except that one time, with a different device, a long, long time ago.)

Other ideas I just thought of: Are you or your brother using a VPN? If so, turn off the VPN and test.
Click to expand...
I don't, and I am about 99% sure he doesn't.
aihpcfl said:
Also, are either you or your brother using a Mac with settings that allow you to send and receive iMessages from the Mac? If so, what if you send from the Mac?
Click to expand...
I send from my Mac more often that from my iPhone, and the problem exists there as well.
aihpcfl said:
Thinking some more along the lines of @aperfectcircle, you have the capability to send an iMessage to an email address, and receive iMessages sent to you at an email address, if that information is provided and enabled in settings. You could test by composing a message from scratch and try sending to a phone number and then sending another test message to an email address, as see if makes a difference. I'm not sure at the moment what that tells you in the event that it makes a difference, but it will be a thread to pull in the event it does.
Click to expand...
I'll see what this does. Edit - this doesn't work. If I try to text to the email address iMessage just replaces the email address with his phone#.
 
jasnw said:
This is a problem with my brother only. Everyone else I text with on a routine basis who have iPhones have no problem sending me or receiving from me iMessage texts. A question I have asked him is if he has this problem with others or just me. No answer yet. Maybe this is some sort of cosmic Big Brother (me) vs. Little Brother (him) karma thing?

I'm trying to avoid iCloud fiddling. We both actively dislike in-the-cloud stuff and disable whatever of it we can. I have only Calendar and Contacts enabled for iCloud use.
Click to expand...
I tend to make the mistake of writing iCloud when I'm thinking Apple Account. I wasn't referring to sync'ing your information to the cloud, I was think instead of some kind of issue with your account. But the fact that you are able to send and receive iMessages with others points to something on your brother's end.

Which raises the question, does HE only have this issue with YOU, or does he also have the issue with EVERYONE else using iPhones?
 
Well, my brother has gone all "dark" on me so I don't have answers from him, yet. But another relative encountered the same problem and she was visiting me so I had a hands-on opportunity. What worked to get her issue resolved was the following (all this was done on her iPhone):

1. Go in to Settings>Apps>Messages.
2. Click on "Send&Receive"
3. In this case she found an alert about problems with her information on this panel (in red) with a suggestion that she delete them and a button to click on to do this (I didn't see this part, so this is third-hand info).
4. If there were no alerts this method won't help. Go have a beer.
5. If there were alerts, go back up one level, toggle iMessage off, wait 3-4 minutes, toggle it back on.
6. Check in "Send&Receive" and see if your correct phone# and email information has been entered (this action is evidently a "push" from the service provider).

After this series of steps her problem was fixed. I'm sure this is a YMMV situation given how flakey the whole Apple iMessage universe seems to be, but it worked once.
 
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