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Stay at IOS 12 if everything works fine...there is no way back from IOS 13. Maybe if you like dark mode.
 
Well, If I had the option I’d go back to 12.4.1 again. It’s not that IOS13 is downright terrible. It runs pretty well and is pretty stable. But the MAIL app.... chessus they screwed that one up - like BAD!
The worst part is there seems to be no focus on remediating it.. Can’t even begin to understand how the current mail app status could in any way resemble release worthy software at Apple - especially considering its a KEY app of your phone.
 
Like Der Keyser, if I could go back to 12.4.1 I would, in a heartbeat. Unfortunately that was never possible with an iPhone 11 Pro Max. I love the 11PM hardware, but iOS 13 is a mess. I'd encourage you to stay on 12.4.1.
 
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I've been on iOS 13 since the first beta and have had minimal issues but it seems I'm one of the lucky ones. I recommend keeping iOS 12 until Apple can clean 13 up a bit.
 
Stay back please. Not sure how long you can though

In theory, as long as you want, if you avoid the subtle update authorizations that can pop up. In real life, though, ultimately, security updates and OS/app feature updates can make this a difficult choice to go with long term. But hey, all you have to do is wait until next September when 14 will presumably fix this mess the way 12 superbly cleaned up 11.
 
I’m staying on 12.4.1 until the Mail and car Bluetooth issues have been resolved. No point in “upgrading” to a crappier experience.
 
I hesitated to update to iOS 11 due to the early issues (and 32-bit deprecation) and ended up taking a pass on it entirely.

The new devices which came from the factory with iOS 12 have been fine.

I suspect iOS 13 may meet the same fate as 11 did, for me.

It's almost like the Star Trek movies -- be wary of the odd numbered ones. (7, 9, 11, and now 13).

Apple now has five different OSes to maintain. Even if they have much in common, that's a lot of work, and rigid annual release schedules aren't helping the cause.

Federighi needs to get a better handle on this tick/tock cycle and prevent it from being a good/bad cycle.
 
Stay on 12.4.1, you'll be much happier. I tried 13.0 and 13.1. Stuttering animations, mail not working correctly, ect. Tried both set up as new on iTunes as well as iCloud. Same result. Went back to 12.4.1. Now all is well... I then set up a tvOs beta profile so I wont be bugged to upgrade to iOS 13. works like a charm. XS Max, 64Gb here...
 
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No right or wrong answer, but I’ve been happy with my move to iOS 13. I very much enjoy the Files app now, and use it regularly. Love dark mode.
 
Stay on 12 for now. I run the betas on another phone and will not put 13 on my XS yet. 13.2 does seem to be much better, though. A lot of the stuttering is gone. Animations are much faster and smoother. I haven’t had a crash yet on 13.2.
 
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The biggest problem for me has been battery life . Definitely a huge drop . The xs max drains out before the end of the day. Don’t use the stock mail app so this has been my biggest concern . My wife has the same problem on her iphone SE
 
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