to see your friend's music, you can look directly on the iPod - you don't need to have it hooked up to a computer to do that.
as for transferring, if it's all legitimate, Senuti is good - i don't know why you're having problems with refreshing - you shouldn't need to refresh; if you're willing to pay (which i presume you're not, but it's good to know anway), i've had good results from iPodRip.