Nine Lives

[GrayFlannel]

What incredibly stupid things have you done in your life? And survived?

I’ll start off with this little teaser.

Once I deliberately shot myself in the foot with my BB gun. After hopping around for several minutes I checked it out. It left a nasty mark! 🤯

 

[Herdfan]

Once I deliberately shot myself in the foot with my BB gun. After hopping around for several minutes I checked it out. It left a nasty mark! 🤯

I have had a BB in my hand for 44 years.

Our school district would do 2-hour delays on snowy mornings. So dad would take to a friend's house on the way to work and we would walk over to the school when it was time. So this one morning we were hanging out waiting to leave and he had a Red Ryder BB gun (yes, the one from the movie) and he would shoot army men in his playroom.

So this one day something happens and I manage to shoot him (accidentally) right in the man zone. Ouch town, population you bro! So in his screaming in pain he manages to find his CO2 BB gun and starts chasing me with it. He was going to shoot me in the butt, but I put my hand back there (yeah, not a good idea) and he shot me right in the palm between my index and middle finger. BB went most of the way through, but didn't exit. So there is a small hump you can feel between my fingers.

Dr. didn't want to remove it because he was afraid of nerve damage. You should see how it looks on an X-ray.

 

[Scepticalscribe]

I'm European, not American and thus, the term "BB" is unknown to me.

Might I ask what this means?

 

[Apple fanboy]

I'm European, not American and thus, the term "BB" is unknown to me.

Might I ask what this means?

Like an air rifle. Shoots small pellets.

 

[chown33]

I'm European, not American and thus, the term "BB" is unknown to me.

Might I ask what this means?

BB gun - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[Scepticalscribe]

Like an air rifle. Shoots small pellets.

BB gun - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Thank you.

Good grief.

You learn something new (well, you - or, some of us - try to) every day.

 

[Scepticalscribe]

............

Once I deliberately shot myself in the foot with my BB gun.

Quite apart from how this statement does sound like a strangely bizarre interpretation of a rather well known metaphor, I do find myself wondering why on earth you would have wanted to do something so spectacularly silly?

 

[GrayFlannel]

Dr. didn't want to remove it because he was afraid of nerve damage. You should see how it looks on an X-ray.

In the rare case when the neighbor kid visited we’d chase each other around the house squirting each other with turkey basters filled with boiling water. You were always vulnerable while reloading at the pot of water on the stove.

 

[GrayFlannel]

Quite apart from how this statement does sound like a strangely bizarre interpretation of a rather well known metaphor, I do find myself wondering why on earth you would have wanted to do something so spectacularly silly?

I had an interesting childhood.

 

[eyoungren]

Like an air rifle. Shoots small pellets.

That's a pellet gun. There is a difference.

Pellets…



BBs

 

[eyoungren]

What incredibly stupid things have you done in your life? And survived?

I’ll start off with this little teaser.

Once I deliberately shot myself in the foot with my BB gun. After hopping around for several minutes I checked it out. It left a nasty mark! 🤯

I'll just name the immediate standout things…

Pulled out without looking. I was a teen and it was a blind corner. Thankfully the guy I pulled out in front of was able to stop in time. But he was in a 1970s TransAm (my car was a 1980 Datsun 210) and had to lock it up.

Later on…

A 45 minute trip completed in 15 minutes. Home to work, average speed 118mph.

A 20 minute trip, completed in 10 minutes, Home to an adjacent city. Average speed, 122mph.

Southern California to Bay Area trip, average trip time 8 hours, completed in about 6 hours. Average speed 95mph.

Southern California to Phoenix, AZ, average trip time 4.5 hours, completed in 2.5 hours. Average speed 95mph.

Yeah…there's a theme here. I've had a few tickets in my lifetime.

Working on my car battery while I had my gold wedding band on. All of a sudden my ring finger got VERY hot! Turns out, I'd made contact with the terminals. I ended up etching in the inscription on my ring deeper.

 

[eyoungren]

I have had a BB in my hand for 44 years.

Our school district would do 2-hour delays on snowy mornings. So dad would take to a friend's house on the way to work and we would walk over to the school when it was time. So this one morning we were hanging out waiting to leave and he had a Red Ryder BB gun (yes, the one from the movie) and he would shoot army men in his playroom.

So this one day something happens and I manage to shoot him (accidentally) right in the man zone. Ouch town, population you bro! So in his screaming in pain he manages to find his CO2 BB gun and starts chasing me with it. He was going to shoot me in the butt, but I put my hand back there (yeah, not a good idea) and he shot me right in the palm between my index and middle finger. BB went most of the way through, but didn't exit. So there is a small hump you can feel between my fingers.

Dr. didn't want to remove it because he was afraid of nerve damage. You should see how it looks on an X-ray.

As you know, I used to live rural. This was SoCal, so we had a local mountain to climb. Went hiking with a friend and had my BB gun along.

With the particular route we took, at this time in the mid-1980s, there was a near vertical shale rock wall to climb before getting to the start of the trail that led up the mountain. My friend and I had just gotten to the top when we saw a party of friends from school down below. For some stupid reason or another we didn't want them coming up. So, I pumped the BB gun once and put a BB in the dirt in front of the group down below.

I saw the puff of dirt, we left.

Turns out…yeah, it hit the dirt in front, but there was a rock underneath that dirt and the BB ricocheted and hit one of my classmates dead on in the center of her chin.

On Monday morning I found out about it because she had a very large red mark on her chin.

Oops.

 

[eyoungren]

A couple more…

One of my last speeding tickets was outside of Blythe, CA. That was CHP, who are notorious for showing up for court. But I figured, since I live in Phoenix, my officer wouldn't show. I figured wrong.

At some point before my notice to appear, I paid the fine because I had the money. I figured I might not have the money later on and there was a good chance the REAL fine would be less (it usually is if you show up instead of just paying the fine). So, I'd actually get some refunded. And I did, but not the way I thought.

I'm before the judge and my officer is there. So I know at this point I'm sunk and I plead guilty. Judge makes his ruling and out of the corner of my eye I see the bailiff coming at me with handcuffs! I quickly tell the judge, "Hey, I paid the fine!". Court clerk flips through her records and tells the judge, "Yes, he paid it". Bailiff, stops and leaves me alone.

Closest I've ever been to being arrested. I got a partial refund for the excess fine in the mail later.

19, student pilot. I land at an airport in Santa Barbara on a solo flight. I'm completely unfamiliar with the airport and in order to get to a restaurant I walk across the end of an active runway. I'm met on the other side by airport police. Apparently, it's against FAA regulations to walk across the end of an active runway. Silly me.

I've never returned to that airport, but they still have my name and address in their files somewhere.

 

[Chuckeee]

Made my own fireworks (including sky rockets) using black powder and powdered metal. Also made (and set off) my own thermite.

 

[Herdfan]

Working on my car battery while I had my gold wedding band on. All of a sudden my ring finger got VERY hot! Turns out, I'd made contact with the terminals. I ended up etching in the inscription on my ring deeper.

That is why I wear a silicone one.

 

[eyoungren]

That is why I wear a silicone one.

My wife and I both wear Tungsten bands now. Unfortunately, the one I have I got around the time my waist line started expanding (and everything else). It still fits, but it's tight and hurts to wear. I need a larger one.

 

[ejb190]

Grew up on a farm. Baling hay is dangerous.

• When I was 10 or so, I was standing at the front edge of a hay wagon while we were baling. The wagon tire dropped into a ground hog hole. I was tossed off the wagon and was promptly ran over by said wagon. Knocked the wind out of me, but didn't really hurt.
• Missed the hay bale with the hook and put the hook into my forearm. Got a scar from that one.
• Sat on a hay hook once. Got a scar from that one, too.
• Fell out of the loft in the barn once when I was overextending to grab a bale. Luckily I landed on the wagon which had a good bit more give compared to the ground.

 

[Apple fanboy]

When I was about 11 or 12 I wasn’t very tall. My Dad was selling his last motorbike and I kept asking him if I could have a ride first.
Eventually he agreed. Needless to say I wasn’t really big enough to ride a 200cc road bike around the garden. Ended up crashing into the greenhouse.
My dad’s words to me. Are you alright? Don’t tell your mother!

Despite being just in shorts and a t-shirt I escaped without a scratch.

 

[eyoungren]

Not me, but my dad. Back in the 1970s during the gas crunch my dad was starting to siphon gas from one of our cars to another. Well…you do that by running the tube down into the tank and then you start sucking on the other end.

You're supposed to get it started and when the first bit comes out you've got your mouth off the tube and the tube stuck into a gas can. In this particular moment, my dad wasn't fast enough and ended up swallowing a bunch of gas.

Which promptly had him coughing, running into the house and vomiting over the sink. It was a long while before he could stop coughing.

Meanwhile my poor six or seven year old self is highly worried that my dad is 'dying'. That wasn't the case of course and after a while of wretching and coughing he finally recovered. But that was the last time I ever saw him siphon gas.

 

[Herdfan]

Grew up on a farm. Baling hay is dangerous.

Lots of farm work is dangerous. Love seeing videos of kids driving combines and all the suburban folk freaking out about how dangerous that is. LOL. They have no idea.

 

[eyoungren]

Lots of farm work is dangerous. Love seeing videos of kids driving combines and all the suburban folk freaking out about how dangerous that is. LOL. They have no idea.

The West Valley (Phoenix) still has enough remaining agriculture so that every once in a while you are sharing road space with farm equipment on major streets (McDowell, Indian School, Camelback, 91st and 99th Ave). Because farmers remaining fields are spread out between all the commercial and industrial areas.

It also says something that there is a major John Deere dealership on McDowell, west of 107th Ave. Of course, when we moved here it was all fields around that place. Now it's homes, apartments and schools plus medical offices.

 

[GrayFlannel]

Grew up on a farm. Baling hay is dangerous.

My neighbor tried clearing a plugged bailer when it gobbled him up feet first. He was lucky the auger and plunger only took off one leg and mangled the other But he survived.

I was pulling a cultivator attached to the three point hitch on the gravel road traveling in road gear. I totally forgot to slow down for a narrow high sided steel bridge. There was only about a foot of clearance on each side of the cultivator when I went through. Normal speed should have been 1-2 mph but I went through at probably 10 or more. I was very very lucky.

Another day and year I was moving the same tractor and cultivator from one field to another in road gear. As I came down a steep hill I shifted the axle into the low side which makes it “free wheel”. Normal top speed on that tractor was probably 15-18 mph but that day I was probably near 25 mph and at the bottom of the hill was a 90 degree curve to the right. I was in deep trouble so I shifted directly to the high side which slowed the wheels immediately but now was skidding on the gravel. I had not locked the brakes together before leaving the field so had to do the best I could to press on them both at the same time with my right foot... then at what felt to be the optimum moment I released the left brake and pressed hard on the right to help make the turn. All came out fine but was very very lucky again.

 

[ejb190]

Lots of farm work is dangerous. Love seeing videos of kids driving combines and all the suburban folk freaking out about how dangerous that is. LOL. They have no idea.

When I did driver's training, it was three farm kids in the car with the instructor. There wasn't a whole lot of instructing going on! (It was conversations about basketball!)

I can't honestly count how many close calls all of us had over the years. Never forget the night my dad was pulled into a PTO shaft on a grain auger. I thought we lost him. My only ambulance ride came from getting kicked in the head by a calf. Saw stars for a week.

 

[GrayFlannel]

When I did driver's training, it was three farm kids in the car with the instructor. There wasn't a whole lot of instructing going on! (It was conversations about basketball!)

I can't honestly count how many close calls all of us had over the years. Never forget the night my dad was pulled into a PTO shaft on a grain auger. I thought we lost him. My only ambulance ride came from getting kicked in the head by a calf. Saw stars for a week.

My father rolled a tractor over on himself, busting up some ribs.
My mother lost an index finger to the first knuckle.
My grandfather lost his right arm to just below the elbow.
I left the farm unscathed.