iPhone 12 mini.
Reading through all these threads I have to ask should I update to iOS17 now or wait for some of the bugs to be ironed out?
At 85 I really don't want to get into a "no use phone" situation.
I wouldn't. I'm in the IT space and I should know better but I ran the OS update without doing a backup first. I am now stuck on iOS 17 and the latest iOS 16 backup I have is dated from June. Here's the thing, if you have no custom notification tones, you're fine. If like me you keep your iPhone on silent 99% of the time, but when you do turn it on, you want to hear it, and you have notifications such that you can tell a text message from your spouse or your mom just from hearing the device. In iOS 17 that's gone. No more custom text tones. And the few they have that are descent can't be heard even if the phone is turned up to 100%.
You can keep your ringtones. Those all stay. I couldn't honestly care about the ringtones as much as the notifications. But you can keep those. It doesn't matter if you bought them or made them yourself. Custom notification tones are gone. I hope you aren't at all lacking in hearing because you'll miss the notification. iOS 17 only has one default notification tone for apps that don't have a custom notification tone of their own. It's brief, nearly silent, and sounds like a soap bubble popping in the kitchen sink.
The call app screen is a little clumsy and ill-conceived. It also appears that if someone has shared a contact poster then you have no choice but to look at it during a call. You can turn yours off so that it doesn't share by default. But with iOS 17 it isn't about you unless you want to impose your self-importance on someone else. If you're projecting narcissism then Contact Posters is for you if you want to block them so your call screen isn't filled with crap and you can focus on the UX of the call system, good luck.
iMessage app tray is clumsy and ill-conceived. You can customize what goes where and you can uninstall any app you don't want. You might not have noticed excess and unused things before because you could swipe an app from the horizontal interface right below your text. Quick and easy. Now you click a plus, troll through a menu, and then click the app then troll through the app offerings, and then tap again, and finally your sticker, meme, etc. has been posted. Clumsy, very wasteful with its approach to using space efficiently, and makes a one to two-click process a three to five-click process. It's shocking to see Apple choose an interface model that is so clumsy.
In Safari once you click the group tab icon an entire horizontal set of group tabs shows. Before you had to turn the Private Browsing tabs on and the entire color of the browser changed. Granted they weren't password-protected. But if someone had your phone and didn't know that private browser tabs were in use, they'd likely not see them. In iOS 17 it's persistent. You can biometrically lock the private browser tab, but it suggests a thing that is there that should be hidden in a truncated menu, because of "Private". And the group tabs and tab interface in general are kind of clumsy.
The overall sense and feel of iOS 17 could be flawlessly summed up with a tag line, "iOS 17: clumsy and ill-considered". Maybe something like, "Thoughtless: by iOS 17". I knew iOS 17 was coming. I didn't see WWDC this year or the Apple Park Wonderlust (or whatever) presentation. The apathy has been slowly building for years I think.
This is honestly the first iOS update I've ever wanted to downgrade that didn't come down to a pure performance issue.
It is an OS for iPhone that is inconsiderate of its user. At least create a backup before you begin. I sure wish I had!