I think you are wrong on your take on this. Here is my take:
Steve Jobs runs a tight ship. Apple is working with the New York Times to provide content, and he always knew he was going to pull up the NY Times home page, and the missing flash plug-in would be there for a second before moving on. But this was not an accident, it was on purpose.
Apple and Adobe have been in a cold war for a while. Adobe feels that Apple jerked their chain by switching OS strategies during the OS9/Rhapsody/Copland days. Adobe then said, fine, we will wait until you figure out what to do and then get around to re-writing our apps. Apple released shiny new Intel Macs and there were no native Adobe apps. Mac users had to keep their G5 computers, or get an Intel Mac and use Rosetta emulation. Every day for over a year, Apple had to hear about people who were not buying new Intel Macs until Adobe shipped. I was one of those people. I bet the day Adobe released native Intel apps was one of Apple's better sales days ever.
That was then, Flash is now. Adobe had a "lite version" of Flash, but it went nowhere. Developers had no real interest in pushing lite apps out. And Jobs is not the type to offer a lite experience anyhow, so he punted. No flash on the iPhone. Flash is notorious for being a bit of a CPU hog, and that would affect battery life and Apple wanted no part of that.
I always kind of felt bad for Dell. There computers were what they were, but a lot of their rep suffered because people had Dells and were having issues with things like viruses. Well, when people get viruses, they don't call Microsoft and ask them why Windows and IE is one giant security hole. People called Dell and said "my computer is junk!"
Apple did not want that to play out with the iPhone and Flash. For security reasons, for performance reasons and for keeping the spotlight on the app store reasons. Apple would be happy if Flash went away.
Anyhow, Jobs knew that the missing plug-in was going to show up and guess what? We are seeing lots of articles about the demise of Flash. A return to server side and web standard technologies. Javascript has risen from the dead. If there is a missing plug-in icon on the NY Times, it's up to the NY Times to make sure they are developing a web site that just works.
I heard a great phrase the other day, the internet has become the splinternet. It's no longer only desktops and laptops connecting to the web, it's phones and now iPads with who knows what capabilities, it's web services consumed by all sorts of things, etc.
The onus is on the developers to develop for the new splinternet, it's not up to the hardware makers to make sure their devices support Flash if it's not appropriate for their device.
Hell hath no fury like a Steve Jobs scorned.
Anyhow, that's my take, it's my opinion, love it or leave it.