one thing to mention is i am quite fortunate in that i have no interference from any neighbours as we live down a quiet country lane and are quite isolated...so is it just a case of trying to keep the 'traffic' down on certain channels, and keeping 2.4GHz to a minimum?
Fortunate that you don't have neighbor interference. My neighborhood is all 3/4 + acre lots with tons of trees so neighbors are not too close, but they are close enough that I do get some interference. So, here is the thing, and BrianBaughn makes a good point. If you oversaturate your airwaves with Wi-Fi, you can do more harm than good, especially if the channels overlap between the access points. This is more true of 2.4 than 5GHz (due to limited channels and longer range of 2.4GHz).
If your Mac runs Sierra (10.12.x), AP Utility now allows you to set the 2.4GHz channel to "OFF", this option is not available on earlier releases of the utility.
In my case, I found that the 3 Airport devices in my network automatically dispersed the 5GHz channels, but all three devices were using Channel 6 on 2.4GHz. The overlap and channel contention caused my 2.4GHz speeds to suffer terribly in some areas of my home. I then changed them to 1, 6 and 11 and things improved. But, my Mac at home is not capable of updating to 10.12.x, so I don't have the option to set the 2.4GHz radios to OFF.
I intend to take a 10.12.x Mac Mini from work home this weekend to turn off 2.4GHz on two of my Airports. My plan is to leave only one device on in a central location, using channel 11 which is farthest from the channels my neighbors use (1-8). What I expect this to do is to remove any contention I currently might be getting from my own, and neighbors networks. Since 2.4GHz signals have a longer range, a single device should cover my home adequately. But, 5GHz signals are weak without the extra Airports. I have IP Cameras, and other legacy devices that are not capable of 5GHz, so I am stuck with keeping 2.4GHz on.
In the days of 2.4GHz networks, due to the longer range, the need for extra Access Points was not as necessary as with 5GHz networks. Many of us simply threw more and newer Access Points in without taking the time (who would have guessed the need to) to optimize our networks to accommodate the extra signals we were throwing into the mix. What we really did is create Helter-Skelter Skelter for our poor little Wi-Fi devices.
So, my guess would be that if you disabled 2.4GHz on all but the Dining Hall Extreme, and set the channel on the Dining Hall Extreme to channel 1 or 11 (to minimize any interference from appliances or any other devices that share the 2.4GHz spectrum), but leave 5GHz on for all of the Airports, you will probably improve things dramatically. Alternately, if that is not sufficient, perhaps only use 2.4 on the Porch and Lounge Access Points (on Channel 1 and 11 respectively). From your diagram, your home's footprint is roughly 13x10 meters (42x32 feet). My home is roughly 18X10 meters, so just a little larger. My guess is, a single Extreme configured for 2.4GHz will more than adequately cover the entire space (it seemed to do so before introducing 5GHz to my mix).
FYI, the general stats on range are roughly 100-150 Feet (30-46m) for 2.4GHz indoors, and about 50% of that for 5GHz. Further, 2.4GHz signals penetrate walls better than 5GHz, but both will decrease if thick, metal or brick walls and ceilings are in the path.