I don't disagree with your overall reasoning, but would caution that with the shared video memory/unified memory architecture it is not a 1:1 relationship (eg 8gb of dDPU memory is not the same as 8gb of unified memory). It's also not magical in that unified memory architecture doesn't magically reduce total amount of memory needed either (although might in some circumstances).
The interactions between them are not straightforward, and will also depend on programming choices, use of different macos frameworks, use profile, programs used (how many would actually use the full 8gb of dGPU memory anyway?), etc. And of course as always how much the OS and programs use the memory to cache things (successfully and intelligently). Some programs will directly address GPU/CPU memory (reducing duplication/system I/O) and hence need less compared to intels with dedicated GPUs; some programs do things differently and don't use much GPU but will use all the system memory they can get.
Unfortunately that sort of leaves us back where we started - some will see more benefit from more memory than others, define "need more memory", tolerance of slowdowns (are they even noticed?), and whether the extra cost is significant to the buyer/user or not. Specific impact of on-board unified memory will vary a lot.
BTW I don't think pure benchmarks of time are the right measure in most cases (but for some, yes). When I do memory intensive stuff on my existing set-up, the main benefit I see with lots of memory is not increased speed for that task but that I can continue doing lots of other tasks without noticing. For the long-running intensive tasks I care less about raw speed but that the machine is 100% usable for the other stuff I'm doing. (This may not be representative, those tasks for me are mostly other I/O constrained - external disks - not CPU; they would be memory and hence swap constrained with less memory).
IMO you made the right choice for you. You could probably get by with 8gb but you're not that price sensitive, your needs may grow, etc.