FWIW, This also means that this *is* a software and/or firmware bug that apple needs to fix...
Here's an example of how the phone seems to be behaving now:
Say the phone needs a minimum of 250mA to charge. It can use up to a full amp, and charge faster, but it will continue to (trickle) charge even with 250mA...
When the phone is plugged in and being used, it will use the amount of power that it needs to operate the phone, and if this amount is less than 750mA (in my example), than the leftover power is used to charge the phone.
This is where the expected behavior and the actual behavior differ:
The phone, ideally, should never use more than an amp of power. This may or may not be the case (if it does use more than an amp under heavy load, then we're SOL, as that's all the stock adapter can supply... my current observations don't support this though, as its currently maintaining a full charge using 3G).
If the phone uses MORE than 750mA of power, then the phone wont be able to charge, just maintain its current charge and use the adapter to run the phone. This seems to be what its trying to do (and certainly what it *should* do), as the phone switches over to its "plugged in" icon.
That's not happening though; the phone is for some reason not able to maintain its current charge when its not full, which indicates that the phone is trying to charge and failing due to not having enough power, but also thinking it doesn't have enough power to run off the adapter (even though it does), presumably due to trying to allocate some power to charge with... If this is actually the case, its a bug, and apple needs to fix it.
Also, what's definitely a bug is even after the phone is no longer using excessive power (IE, no longer on 3G), it wont start charging again... It remains "plugged in." To start charging again you need to unplug and replug the cable.
If the phone is actually using more than an amp... we need a bigger power supply

(Though, the current one is already double USB spec, which maxes out at 500mA @ 5V).