I have a 165mm wrist as well, but went with the M/L Leather link - same amount of pills on the backside for me, too. Odd. I was worried about having enough overlap for a strong clasp. Ah - ok - I checked the store - for the 41mm Case, the S/M goes to a max of 160mm...but on the 45mm case, the S/M goes to 180. Either way - I'm Happy!
So within 20 hours of my order through apple with their free shipping, it delivered to my door. Here's my Midnight Leather with Blue Al, and some others of my small collection of bands. I usually only have one, maybe two bands per watch at a time, so I'm just in the minor leagues with this.
Digging the Black and Blue action!
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