If you had it for a month, you didn't try very hard at all it seems. I have had my SGS2 Skyrocket for about 2 weeks now, and I have not rooted it or placed any custom roms on it, yet I have an app that notifies me, even in standby, if I have an sms, email, text, app update and so on, via audio and visual notification. The app is called NoLED. And this also takes care of notification badges too, since NoLED tells you exactly how many missed calls, texts, sms messages, voice mails, charging indicator, current weather and any app you specify that updates.
Gmail is a POS email client. If you had ask sd any Android user, they would have guided you to K-9, although iOS'es email and Sparrow are much, much better than any Android email app. K-9 would have been in 3rd place to those 2, if it was on iOS.
Can't help the fact you have small hands and a 4.5 inch screen is too big. A little planning and educating yourself by playing with in store phones could have told you the S2 would be too big for you.
Point is, you don't have much in the way of a valid point. If you had given your opinion about the Android OS not being to your liking, or there was lag in the processes that you couldn't stand or some other hardware glitch, I could understand. But what you posted... That was more akin to someone complaining, just to complain, imo. Not hating on you, it's just how I perceived your post.
Personally, I enjoy using Android, but I also enjoy WebOS and iOS. Got no real complaints about any of them. It really seems like people hate on iOS or Android because they didn't educate themselves fully on the capabilities, or they are just hating to hate (you see this a lot on the Android forums, unfortunately.)