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~Shard~ said:Ouch. I don't know how that CAN'T be taken as rude...
i'm just asking an honest question. i'm not the kind of person that goes around trying to insult people. questions should only hurt someone when the truthful answer bothers them
blue&whiteman said:i'm just asking an honest question. i'm not the kind of person that goes around trying to insult people. questions should only hurt someone when the truthful answer bothers them
And that's fair enough, I wasn't knocking you or anything - I was just making the comment that a question like that usually leads to "complications", if you will - kinda like the classic "does this make me look fat?" question wives pose to their husbands.
My intention was not to tear into you by any means (note my wink at the end of my statement) so no worries at all.
If she doesn't look like a girl to you, then I would have to suggest that you get your eyes checked out and perhaps your head examined, especially after the first round of pics she posted.
vniow said:
look. I wasn't trying to be rude at all but since you ask I will tell you why I asked. you look like a guy. you have hair like a woman and dress like one but totally have the body and face structure of a male. I cannot blame you for how you look. I was just asking.
Powerbook G5 said:If she doesn't look like a girl to you, then I would have to suggest that you get your eyes checked out and perhaps your head examined, especially after the first round of pics she posted.
I have had my head examined and all was well
I also have 20/20 vision.
blue&whiteman said:yes I did. please don't hate me
I don't hate you, I'm just wondering how you got "guy" out of all those.
who knows? Maybe, just maybe he was a little confused by the crappy webcam pics...thats a stretch though. If you want to get analytical about it, check back on vniows first set of pictures. There aren't a lot of men around with cheekbones that high, and there's also the issue of the feminine facial musculature, which is in women is usually much less defined and certainly less prominent. I dunno, if its just me speaking because i notice facial details like that (hey, an art minor's gotta be useful for something, right?), but there hasn't been any question of vniow's gender when looking at her pics.
Which brings me back to what i was going to post originally:
vniow, what prompted the sudden posting of all these pictures?
Which brings me back to what i was going to post originally:
vniow, what prompted the sudden posting of all these pictures?
no need to ask stupid questions. look what he said:vniow said:
He has a point. in fact, he hit the nail on the head, or would have not too long ago, right? he's not trying to be mean. there's no reason to treat him like an idiot. if you don't want to talk about it, just say so.blue&whiteman said:
shadowfax said:
I don't think anybody is treating anybody like an idiot. They seem to be talking about it better than many would in the same situation.
It does seem a little naive to say, "what are you, a man or woman" and then "questions should only hurt when the answer bothers them". Most people are not comfortable thinking they are of indeterminate sex, so in this case, the answer (either a man or a woman) shouldn't bother, but the implication of the question (people can't tell what sex you are) may bother.
Some people don't care, and that is fine. Others like to project an image strongly feminine or masculine. That is fine, too. But sometimes some care should be taken. B&Wman does have a forthright attitude in other posts, so he can say it without coming across as too rude, if you are familiar with his posts.
Dros said:
funny. many of my friends and family have commented on how forthright I am. only one that really seems to like it is my wife
I am a simple buddhist, I mean no harm.. maybe it was too personal a question?
I don't see much as being too personal because of my free form of thinking. a question does not have to be answered after all..
blue&whiteman said:funny. many of my friends and family have commented on how forthright I am. only one that really seems to like it is my wife
I am a simple buddhist, I mean no harm.. maybe it was too personal a question?
I don't see much as being too personal because of my free form of thinking. a question does not have to be answered after all..
I think forthrightness is a good quality as well.
But think of this. If you were asked, "Would you taste good slowly roasted in a hot oven?", the answer is immaterial... the question itself is enough to make you uncomfortable!
I think shes a pretty hot lady, myself! or is that my 19 year old hormones speaking? Nah shes hot.
even better, shes hot AND likes apples.... score!
Nah shes hot. even better, shes hot AND likes apples.... score!
tpjunkie said:
I finally got to a point where I was satisfied enough with the way I look to let others see it.
shadowfax: I'm not trying to treat anybody like an idiot. Regardless of my facial structure, I think its pretty clear (especially by the first round of pics) that I'm presenting myself as female. So excuse me if I'm a bit touchy around the question "are you a male or a female?" since if you haven't been on the boards for the past three years, my gender has come into question a number of times.
vniow,
I am so sorry if I have caused you any mental stress. not my intention I can assure you. please accept my deepest apologies.
sometimes I can be too forthright.
I am so sorry if I have caused you any mental stress. not my intention I can assure you. please accept my deepest apologies.
sometimes I can be too forthright.
blue&whiteman said:
No stress really, just a bit unnerved. I respect your forthrightness but be aware that what you perceive to be forthright can be percieved as intrusive by others.
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