I feel it necessary to bring this up here, since it was brought up in another thread a couple days ago. Plus, I was just talking with someone about it (it just came up, I didn't force it). Why do we (humans collectively) tend to feel uncomfortable around people with disabilities? I looked it up, and the statistic says the nearly 70% of people actually feel uncomfortable.
I think it has to do with a variety of factors. People not having enough experience around these folks is probably the most important. Also, people not being sure what to expect. That's what makes people "uncomfortable."
I was around a lot of people with disabilities when I was younger, because I was in special education through middle school. And I am, uh, probably one of these people myself. So I know there is nothing to "worry" about. I'm sure a lot of other people on this forum are the same way.
Anyway, just a thought that crossed my mind. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to post this because it's so personal, and it pains me a little to write this, but I think it's really, really important. To give you an idea, I wrote this with my eyes closed so I didn't have to see the words unravel. But it did get discussed in a couple other threads, so why not bring it up here while the topic is still relevant to a lot of us.
I think that it is not just not knowing what to expect, or sometimes, more than just not knowing what to expect (though that is certainly a part of it).
It is also a fear of not knowing how to behave - what behaviour is expected of one in these circumstances - not just not knowing how the person in question will behave (and how you are then supposed to react).
And it may be fear of responsibility, fear of commitment, fear that you may be asked to do something that you are unwilling, unable (and unqualified) to do, not just physically but emotionally.
However, I also suspect that it may include a subliminal or subconscious fear (for some, approaching terror), almost of something like contagion, that, in the worst possible circumstances, this, too, may happen to you. A form of denial, if you will, something along the lines of, if I don't see it, it isn't - and cannot be - happening.
From a personal perspective, I will say that I saw for myself how some of this played out during my mother's long decline and descent into dementia; while quite a number of her friends had predeceased her, some people just simply disappeared during those years.
On the other hand, some of the best people were those who had gone through some sort of domestic trauma or tragedy themselves, - people on whom life had already made considerable and extraordinary demands - people whose own lives had been impossibly stressed at some point; they understood without words, and they simply (and with incredible generosity and kindness), showed up, (physically, or psychologically) offering what lay within their power, or means, without asking anything in return.