I share some of your thoughts here as well. I was horribly disappointed when I saw the X really was delivered with that notch, narrow screen, lack of touch ID, all those round lines, etc. I had my 6S+ for two years at that point, and wanted an upgrade so bad. Ultimately I bought the 8+, which I really like, but at the same time wanted a OLED and larger screen. I know some people like the X, but it is an unmitigated disaster in my opinion.
It sounds like what you want is an iPhone X+, and you might get your wish this year! I'm afraid you might have to accept the notch, but honestly it isn't that bad. I don't really notice it. I'm very happy with the X, because I've never wanted to carry a plus phone.
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People say that the 8 Plus is too big, but it’s my first plus sized phone and it seriously only took a day to feel perfectly natural to me. Now the non Plus iPhones, including the X, actually seem too small. I know that the X’s display is larger on paper, but I’ve actually held them and used them side by side and the wider display of the Plus definitely feels bigger and displays more content.
That, combined with a home button and TouchID, and a larger battery make the Plus a superior phone for my personal preferences. The fact that it also costs less is icing on the cake. I still would have chosen it if they were priced the same.
I thought the iFixit teardown determined that the X has more battery than the 8+? From the teardown:
"This phone is packing a 10.35 Wh (2716 mAh at 3.81 V) battery, just beating out the 10.28 Wh 8 Plus battery, but a drop in the bucket compared to the Galaxy Note8 with its 12.71 Wh behemoth."
Of course they are in the same ballpark, but anyone's mileage may vary when it comes to how long a single charge can get you.
I think it really comes down to the differences in display, home button or not, TouchID vs FaceID, and the slightly better camera specs on the X. Yes there is a difference in price as well, but the X is not much more of a stretch. I'm glad I bought the X, but as dazzling as OLED is I prefer LCD. I go back and forth between my X and my iPad Pro. Both have great displays, but the OLED has a bit of color shift in dark settings. Looks great in daylight or typical indoor lighting though. I would gladly buy an iPad with FaceID and no home button. Using the X feels more fluid, and it's often like there are no locks at all because FaceID just works without me having to touch or do anything (this is especially noticeable when launching secure apps that can leverage FaceID). Both the X and the 8+ beg to be held and used with two hands, but I feel I can more securely and comfortably operate the X with one hand. This is why it's important for people to try them both in the store. Handling them side by side you are usually drawn to one more than the other. That said, I spent a lot of time with my mother's 8+ and I don't think you can go wrong with either device.