Splurge
OK so I drafted the splurge below about three days ago but refrained from posting because in an unrelated area I found myself flying off the handle. At the time I wasn't sure whether some of this topic had rubbed off in that other area, and if the opposite was true I didn't want any software-related anger misplaced here.
Anyway I slept on it a few times and I'm sure that the anger was totally software related so here's some of what I drafted. There was more, but I can't be bothered to edit it
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Filtering out noise
from a single person, in a group environment, is very rarely desirable, but that filtering
can be a surprisingly effective way of filtering out noise of a particular type. A type that does not progress knowledge and understanding
when responded to in that environment.
More than 'can' be … in cases such as this I believe that it's
very likely to be effective – pleasantly effective – for those most deeply concerned (or 'emotionally drained' or whatever).
Sincerely, it's never nice to see, hear or read of someone drained in that way – whether self-inflicted or not, it's a milld form of torture.
Announcing the ignorance, as I did, is even less desirable because it has the potential to increase the torture of
any number of readers. However I'm equally sincere about the surprise that first came, still comes, when I use the feature. It
pleases me (e.g. I'm not tempted to workaround the ignore feature to read what someone might be saying behind my back, and I'm very touchy about that type of thing so I'm surprised to find myself not tempted). It should
please the perceived offender because the feature vastly reduces the likelihood of me responding in an overtly dismissive or ill-mannered way. It
should please other readers because it reduces the likelihood of them having to read responses from me that are sometimes intentionally harsh, pushy and provocative.
Whilst I go as quiet as possible (by reading as little as possible of posts that might outrage me), it's almost certain that at least one other person will continue to challenge the outrageous aspects without feeling pushed over an edge.
You don’t have to tolerate intolerance to be tolerant. …
+1
So for example,
in reality, statements such as "I'm not going to sit/stand here and listen to this". And yes, I have taken that attitude at least once – most memorably, in a team meeting twenty-something years ago, when
a mere nod of the head (in agreement) from a manager, in response to a colleague voicing a suggestion that the manager had privately carelessly dismissed when voiced by me, was enough for me to stand whilst he spoke then look at him as blankly as possible whilst silently walking out of the room as he tried to continue speaking. Given a few other things that had occurred, I had absolutely no desire to question his hypocrisy in the presence of the group. I knew from that moment that I could do far better for myself than continue to work with great colleagues, whilst mismanagement slowly but surely spoilt that greatness. Bluntly:
I didn't want to waste my time.
Yeah ... sorry ... I get that. It's just very difficult to shrug off some of these comments. I don't know why I'm always surprised to see how incredibly stupid people can be. I know this section is designed specifically for these kinds of debates. I'll just continue to add to my ignore list I suppose.
An offender may be well-meaning, in intent, but in cases such as these I'm almost certain that no amount of rational debate from respondents will cause that person to realise the
ill meaning in some of his or her expressions. Also, that person should realise that no amount of good intent can cause
a belief that is perceived to be sick (e.g.
the sick belief that homosexuality is by definition immoral) to be accepted by people, straight and gay and so on, people who can realise the sickness in what's written.
… I have a hard time understanding your post. What community do you mean?
Yeah my writing was clumsy but I wanted to get the thought rolling. At the end of that post I meant you being (presumably) in 'the straight community', me in 'the gay community'. But that wasn't the point of the post. I'll prefix this with an assurance that it's well-meaning: I wondered whether you might be one of the blissfully ignorant (happily unaware) straight people who might be unable to imagine what it's like to see a couple walk hand-in-hand without a care, and know (as I do) that such a simple pleasure –nothing sexual, just holding hands without a care – can never happen. This is another clumsily worded paragraph so (please) don't sieze upon it.
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Fast forward to Wednesday evening. Fireworks and stuff. Hmm, that was religion-related, wasn't it!
Peace.
