You should go with your gut. No sense staying with a product you won’t be happy with. That said, I’m female, also tall, and don’t have small hands. I had the 12.9“ for a few days, and I found that by the time I added a case, it was just too cumbersome for my usage scenario. It was beautiful, but it felt clumsy to me, and I was terrified of dropping it. It would have been wonderful if I were going to use it primarily while sitting at a desk.I'm still kinda having low key second thoughts on whether I should just get the 12.9 inch model or not. I mean I already have the magic keyboard and smart folio for the 11 inch so it'd be a hassle to return it, and I've already waited 18 days and it should be arriving between the 24th and the 1st so what's a few more days of torture. I had been waiting to get the iPad Pro since they announced them in 2018 and I had decided back then on the 11 inch as I felt it'd be lighter and easier to travel with as opposed to a giant slab I always thought the 12.9 inch model to be compared to the 7.9 inch mini 4 I've been using as my primary non-phone communication device for three years, however after playing with both models at BestBuy it threw me into this quandary as the 11 inch just seems like it's only slightly bigger then the 7.9 inch mini, and a YouTube reviewer who first said the 11 inch model was the way to go now has gone back and stated he was wrong and is now touting how the 12.9 inch isn't as heavy as he was expecting with his job in a hospital and how much he prefers it for doing things. He then goes into the psychology of the screen sizes and how the Pro is used with creation and productivity verses consumption.
Just something to consider. Maybe you should order the one from Best Buy and use it until the 11” arrives. Then you can make an informed decision. I’m sure Apple would issue a refund or credit if you decide to stay with the 12”, given that you haven’t received the 11” yet.