What’s on your mind?

[rm5]

I gotta practice my drumming, haven’t done that in a few months. Plan to today though. Playing drums has REALLY helped my piano and bass playing, actually. Making sure to put the snare accents in the right places helps me with piano comping, and making sure the time on the ride cymbal (and hi hat on 2 and 4 in the case of swing) is immaculate seems to have helped my bass playing. Of course, all three help each other, but those two things are what I’ve noticed especially.

 

[Herdfan]

That I am not being forced to go to my MIL's for Thanksgiving. Seems she went full bitch on my BIL and he's not going so my wife has decided we aren't going.

Sometimes it's the little things you enjoy.

 

[rm5]

Sorry to hear this, that seriously sucks.

Thanksgiving looks to be small for my family this year. Not because of bad family dynamics though—we all get along well, fortunately. Just my older cousins are now all in their mid-20s, graduated from college already, so they're working all in different parts of the country.

 

[Apple fanboy]

That I am not being forced to go to my MIL's for Thanksgiving. Seems she went full bitch on my BIL and he's not going so my wife has decided we aren't going.

Sometimes it's the little things you enjoy.

Reading this reminds me of the years when we used to have to try and keep both sets of parents happy at Christmas. As both mine and Mrs AFB parents are divorced the maths was never great. Someone always felt hard done by. Especially when we moved hours away.
Gladly we don’t do people pleasing anymore. The only long distance trips I make in December now are for the stock take we do at work each year.

 

[Herdfan]

Reading this reminds me of the years when we used to have to try and keep both sets of parents happy at Christmas.

My MIL has NEVER been flexible. Instead she expected my parents to come to her house. They did it once and that was it.

So every year, especially at Christmas, it was either host them all at our house, be there for Christmas or leave my parents at noon on Christmas and drive 5 hours to her house.

A couple of years ago a big winter storm hit the day before we were supposed to leave, so we didn't go up until a couple days after Christmas. My wife's brother and I went out to get something and he was saying that his mom really liked to have everyone at the house. I told him he was talking to the wrong person as his mom had controlled our holidays for the 28 years we had been married.

Also told him that when our daughter was 6,7,8 all I wanted to do was take her on a Disney cruise over Christmas. And every year his mom would bully my wife into not doing it. He had no idea and was kind of pissed she would do that.

Now he isn't speaking to her so we don't have to go. My wife never wanted to go against her mom for fear of pissing off her brother. No longer an issue.

 

[Apple fanboy]

My MIL has NEVER been flexible. Instead she expected my parents to come to her house. They did it once and that was it.

So every year, especially at Christmas, it was either host them all at our house, be there for Christmas or leave my parents at noon on Christmas and drive 5 hours to her house.

A couple of years ago a big winter storm hit the day before we were supposed to leave, so we didn't go up until a couple days after Christmas. My wife's brother and I went out to get something and he was saying that his mom really liked to have everyone at the house. I told him he was talking to the wrong person as his mom had controlled our holidays for the 28 years we had been married.

Also told him that when our daughter was 6,7,8 all I wanted to do was take her on a Disney cruise over Christmas. And every year his mom would bully my wife into not doing it. He had no idea and was kind of pissed she would do that.

Now he isn't speaking to her so we don't have to go. My wife never wanted to go against her mom for fear of pissing off her brother. No longer an issue.

So we had one year when my Dad’s wife totally lost it with my wife (as she was drunk). Basically we got up at 6 am the following day and left. Mrs AFB didn’t sleep at all.
Then there was the year two of our parents got their wires crossed and thought we were at theirs for Christmas dinner.
So after a few years of this, I basically said we weren’t going to start every Christmas morning with a three hour drive. They were welcome to come visit but Miss AFB didn’t need to miss every Christmas morning being in a car.

Anyway all academic now. Miss AFB is long gone and so is Christmas. We just treat it like any other day these days.
I don’t miss all that crap.

 

[Expos of 1969]

My MIL has NEVER been flexible. Instead she expected my parents to come to her house. They did it once and that was it.

So every year, especially at Christmas, it was either host them all at our house, be there for Christmas or leave my parents at noon on Christmas and drive 5 hours to her house.

A couple of years ago a big winter storm hit the day before we were supposed to leave, so we didn't go up until a couple days after Christmas. My wife's brother and I went out to get something and he was saying that his mom really liked to have everyone at the house. I told him he was talking to the wrong person as his mom had controlled our holidays for the 28 years we had been married.

Also told him that when our daughter was 6,7,8 all I wanted to do was take her on a Disney cruise over Christmas. And every year his mom would bully my wife into not doing it. He had no idea and was kind of pissed she would do that.

Now he isn't speaking to her so we don't have to go. My wife never wanted to go against her mom for fear of pissing off her brother. No longer an issue.

Not easy I realize, but it seems your wife has bullied you for 28 years regarding Christmas plans.

 

[DaveFromCampbelltown]

Isn't modern technology wonderful?

Once upon a time, you would go to the doctor, get a piece of paper (script), go over the road to the chemist (pharmacist / drug store / whatever it's called in your country), hand over the script, wait a few minutes and then go home with your medicine.

Now, you can do it all online

1. Go to the doctor and get an electronic script
2. Go home, start up the computer, log in.
3. Bring up the Chemist website, log in
   1. Find the product you need
   2. Add to cart
   3. Enter a page of personal details (which you did last time, but they upgraded the software and lost all your details)
   4. Enter the Electronic script number
   5. Enter your Medicare number (re-enter it several times because the number on your card only has spaces, but the online version wants dashes...)
   6. Enter your Concession Card number (as above, but no dashes or spaces, in spite of what is printed on your card)
   7. Enter your Safety net number (which is so long, with mixed letters and numbers that it could cope with 100 times more people than are on the planet)
   8. Double check everything above
4. Press the Go button.

Wait at home for several days for the Post Office to lose your package.

Isn't technology marvellous?*

* Warning, some sardonicism may have been expressed in this post.

 

[Expos of 1969]

Isn't modern technology wonderful?

Once upon a time, you would go to the doctor, get a piece of paper (script), go over the road to the chemist (pharmacist / drug store / whatever it's called in your country), hand over the script, wait a few minutes and then go home with your medicine.

Now, you can do it all online

1. Go to the doctor and get an electronic script
2. Go home, start up the computer, log in.
3. Bring up the Chemist website, log in
   1. Find the product you need
   2. Add to cart
   3. Enter a page of personal details (which you did last time, but they upgraded the software and lost all your details)
   4. Enter the Electronic script number
   5. Enter your Medicare number (re-enter it several times because the number on your card only has spaces, but the online version wants dashes...)
   6. Enter your Concession Card number (as above, but no dashes or spaces, in spite of what is printed on your card)
   7. Enter your Safety net number (which is so long, with mixed letters and numbers that it could cope with 100 times more people than are on the planet)
   8. Double check everything above
4. Press the Go button.

Wait at home for several days for the Post Office to lose your package.

Isn't technology marvellous?*

* Warning, some sardonicism may have been expressed in this post.

I hope the "old fashioned" way is still an option where you live.

 

[rm5]

I need to re-digitize a lot of my vinyls over winter break... just listening to some of the files now and about half of them are MONO FILES! Not only are they mono, but what would be the right channel of stereo is actually missing. So I'm only getting the left channel in mono. No way I'll make it through all 300 or however many, at least during the time I'm home, but I can at least get a start.

On a similar note, I have numerous CDs and vinyls (along with some other stuff) in my Amazon cart ready to order.

 

[rm5]

Once upon a time, you would go to the doctor, get a piece of paper (script), go over the road to the chemist (pharmacist / drug store / whatever it's called in your country), hand over the script, wait a few minutes and then go home with your medicine.

I never do it online, too unreliable. Plus, I often need prescriptions immediately anyway. That's just how I do it though.

 

[mtbdudex]

My youngest child, 18 year old son, is doing “the Crucible” now, 2am Thursday thru 8am Saturday.
We’ve not talked with him since September 3rd, picking him up November 27th.

That’s what’s on our mind.

 

[Apple fanboy]

My youngest child, 18 year old son, is doing “the Crucible” now, 2am Thursday thru 8am Saturday.
We’ve not talked with him since September 3rd, picking him up November 27th.

That’s what’s on our mind.

That’s a challenge. Good luck to him. Makes me tired reading it.

 

[decafjava]

I never do it online, too unreliable. Plus, I often need prescriptions immediately anyway. That's just how I do it though.

I just get mine emailed and print it out...combo old and new style.

 

[decafjava]

My youngest child, 18 year old son, is doing “the Crucible” now, 2am Thursday thru 8am Saturday.
We’ve not talked with him since September 3rd, picking him up November 27th.

That’s what’s on our mind.

Wow, good for him. That's real hardcore.

 

[Krafty]

Gotta be honest, that hits so hard. I can’t count how many times I’ve felt the same way.

BUT…. I don’t know if that’s actually true. Like I said, I’ve felt that way many times, but often it’s not true. Your friends may like you, and they might be your true friends. But they may have said no for either of two reasons—they’re busy, or they’re not interested in the particular activity.

Here’s what I’d suggest, if my advice is worth anything—wait awhile, then, if hanging out with them is your goal, just ask to do that! Doesn’t matter where. Could be at their house, or at the beach, or you could take them out for dinner. It doesn’t really matter. Or, ask them what they’d like to do! That can go a long way, too.

Trust me, I am a TERRIBLE socializer. I’ve gotten a little better since I’m in college, and managed to make some friends. But I’m still terrible in that realm.

Lastly, I really do believe that being a nice person, and being invested in the other individual, goes a LONG way. I mean that. I do not care if you’re a person with special needs (speaking from experience, this can make it a bit harder). I do not care your political ideology (you get to have an opinion, and so do I). I don’t care your socioeconomic situation. If you are a nice person who I can get along with (and our relationship is two-sided), that’s all it takes for me to be friends with you. At some point, I don’t understand why it needs to be any more complicated that that.

As far as online relationships go—those can be tricky, but I’ve managed to have pretty good luck in general. In fact, I think online relationships can actually turn into bigger things. For instance, awhile back I happened to be in the same area as the guy, and I’d known him for awhile and trusted him (and he felt the same for me), so we met in-person. And that was really fun! So while I don’t think those are the ideal kind of relationship, they do have potential.

Thank you.

 

[Herdfan]

They were welcome to come visit but Miss AFB didn’t need to miss every Christmas morning being in a car.

Yes, our daughter has realized that she missed out on many holidays with my parents and she resents her other grandmother for it. Has no desire to ever see her again.

Not easy I realize, but it seems your wife has bullied you for 28 years regarding Christmas plans.

I get the concept, but happy wife, happy life. . In reality, she didn't want to have to do it either, but her mom is a beeotch and my parents didn't really care. When our daughter was 5, we moved into a new house that would allow all of them to come to us, so we did that most years.

All I ever wanted was to have a Christmas with just the 3 of us and no one else.

 

[Expos of 1969]

Yes, our daughter has realized that she missed out on many holidays with my parents and she resents her other grandmother for it. Has no desire to ever see her again.



I get the concept, but happy wife, happy life. . In reality, she didn't want to have to do it either, but her mom is a beeotch and my parents didn't really care. When our daughter was 5, we moved into a new house that would allow all of them to come to us, so we did that most years.

All I ever wanted was to have a Christmas with just the 3 of us and no one else.

I really feel for you but you let it happen. You carry some bitterness and resentment which is understandable. The happy wife, happy life is not applicable in my opinion. Do what you and your daughter want moving forward. You cannot erase the past but you can ensure the future is better.

 

[Mitthrawnuruodo]

When the big Christmas Bauble appears in the Botanical Garden in Bergen it's time to start thinking about what to get everybody for Christmas.

Anyone started their Christmas shopping? 🧑‍🎄🎁🤶