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UPDATE #10:
-Maybe the PC won't be so bad! Even though it's from 2003, my dad upgraded it so much, it's practically new. It sports an 8-core i7, 2x1TB SSD, 32 gb ddr4 RAM, 16 gb NVIDIA GeForce (I forget the version), and had the loud, old fans replaced with quieter, more reliable fans. I'm surprised I didn't use this before. It sure beats my MBP with a 512 GB SSD, 8 gb RAM, and Intel HD 3000 Graphics 512 mb. I'll keep you guys posted on my progress. For now, I'll take the weekend to get myself situated with this computer and try to Hackintosh it.