Thanks for these details.
I just wondered how it feels to be the person next to someone using a VP. Me and my partner often sit in the same room, each doing our own thing on our respective devices. But the thing is, I can just glance at his screen to get a sense of what he's doing, and he can do the same to me. If one or both of us were wearing the VP, we wouldn't have the same sense of what the other was doing. I wonder if that could lead to less sense of sharing the same space. But maybe it isn't really all that isolating, since as you say, you can still see her cooking show.
oh, and which show? It's not Top Chef, by any chance?
Well, I do think there is a certain point in a relationship it's enough to still be breathing. Might sound sad, but for us it's a peaceful feeling. And when she really wants to talk, she puts her show on pause and I don't even ask, just take off the AVP and look over. In a sense, the AVP makes it easier to focus on her, and disengage with it than an iPad or laptop, with those, even if I look away from those screens, they're tempting me to glance back. Or maybe I linger before I stop looking because it's just so easy to. Just one moment dear. One more moment. really, just one more last thing. With the AVP, it's either all the way on, or all the way off. It's a strong statement and commitment. She knows she has 100% of my attention when it's off. And when we are done, I put it back on, it's exactly in the work where I left off and she can go back to what she was doing without feeling guilty either. I have spoken to her about the overall experience, and she doesn't find it has brought isolation to us at all. But then she is very accepting of my toys. And I of hers. No double meanings in there.
Oh, and if she wants to know what I am doing. She asks. And if I am doing something I think she might find interesting. I tell. But we come from an age where we learned to communicate without screens at all. I don't mean that in a condescending way. It's just we dont look at each other's screens even when we can.
Thinking about it some more, it's also a matter of comfort level with the individual. when my sons come to visit I would not wear it at all, because I knew they would tease me. Which, they kept asking me to put it on so they could. But then curiosity got the best of them, and they tried it, and I didnt laugh at them. They loved it. But the most interesting thing to me is, they really went in to it with no preconceived notions, took maybe 2 minutes to learn how to use it, and then USED it. They didnt explore what it could or couldn't do. weren't that interested in the canned demos. They just did their own thing. we had it mirrored to the tv and we followed along. One son apparently likes zooming in on obscure places in Africa and checking out the restaurant scene. really. No idea why, but we were all laughing and having fun comparing prices. And they never once complained about it being uncomfortable, seemingly have inherited my thick skin, or maybe their mother's tolerance to pain. So yes, sometimes when the four of them (wife and daughter in law included) play Mario Cart I slip on the AVP. It's not a five player game.
Sorry, I digressed.
But you asked what cooking show. Um. As far as I can tell, all of them. She watches the food network. I do find Gordon Ramsey interesting enough to watch (some of), but yes, Top chef, Iron Chef, Micky Mouse Chef, oh, the hamburger guy is a family favorite, the diner drive in guy? I used to like that guy (alton?) that related it to chemistry, because I am a scientist, but he is off the air now. I think there was a scandal? but she also likes to go on YouTube and watch specific clips on specific techniques or recipes. We use Apple TV.
Now anticipating the next question, she doesn't want an AVP. I asked. Not terribly surprised, she still uses a 6 year old iPad for crying out loud. She wont let me buy her a new one because it does what she wants she says. Apparently she didn't get the memo about bezels. Her computer set up, again, by choice is one screen. She just hasn't been seduced by the multiple screen siren yet. And honestly, our big screen is big enough to watch movies on together and I dont think side by side AVP viewing would be much better. So no AVP for her!